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CES Gadgets That Take the Cake for Being Completely Awful

From vacuum shoes to toilet robots and more, these are an all-time no for me.

It’s a wrap on CES for another year, and together we’ve seen our share of both weird and wonderful devices in 2023, but… mostly weird.

Flying cars and obscure robots are so old hat now, and so I wondered if CES could do anything less practical and even more completely bonkers. Turns out it can! Over the past 20-plus years, I’ve seen gadgets so stupefying that sometimes they exist purely because journalists like me will write about them. But it’s time to call out the really awful ones, the worst of the worst. Vacuum shoes, toilet paper robots, MP3 weapon holsters, it’s your time to shine!

The most interesting part about this rogues gallery is that some of these products — the Pepe pet dryer, the HapiFork and the Hushme, to name a few — are still being sold today. That’s right: You blew it up, you maniacs!

Dyson Zone Air-Purifying Headphones

Not technically a CES product, as this was announced during 2022, but Dyson was demonstrating the Zone headphones in Las Vegas during CES 2023. Though the Zone looks like it should be a COVID mask, that’s unfortunately not what it does. According to the Dyson site, development on the Zone began way back in 2016 as a personal air filter — for pollution, mainly — and as such, it was never designed to protect against COVID. Furthermore, one critic has claimed the gadget’s force-driven fans could even help maximize your chances of catching coronavirus. CNET’s Katie Collins, who tried it out at Dyson’s HQ in the UK, thought it was “too brilliant and bizarre to ignore.”

Read more: Dyson Zone Air Filtering Headphones on Sale in January for $949

Charmin Rollbot

Computer peripherals manufacturer Razer is the king of creating “look at me” products specifically for CES, but toilet tissue brand Charmin became notorious for this 2020 entry. That’s right, in the year that saw the mass panic buying of toilet paper came a robot that could bring you even more! Coincidence? Yes… probably. The RollBot was never going to be a real product, but we loved/loathed it anyway.

Read more: These Charmin Robots Make Us Wonder: Is Pooping the Next Tech Frontier?

Kolibree Smart Toothbrush

Remember when we had to wash our hands for 20 seconds by singing songs to ourselves? The same methodology also applies to brushing your teeth, but why should you use your own brain and lips like a sucker? There have been many smart toothbrushes over the years, but today I’m picking on the Kolibree. Everything was just fine until the arrival of “the world’s first connected electric toothbrush.” Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you…

Read more: Kolibree’s Connected Toothbrush Aims for Better Dental Health

Taser MP3 Holster

Back in the 2000s, the iPod became such a cultural phenomenon that every company rushed to create an MP3 player of its own. This culminated in what is one of the dumbest CES products in recent memory: the Tazer MP3 holster. Imagine trying to not only charge your holster but also connect it via USB to your computer to fill it up with 1GB of tunes.

Read more: What Every Taser Needs: A Music-Playing Holster

Pepe Pet Dryer

Want to find a new way to make your small dog or cat hate you forever? Lock them in a cube prison for 25 minutes (!) and subject them to gusts of hot air. This combination torture device/dryer would have set you back $660, or you could just throw a towel over your wet dog like a normal human.

Read more: At CES 2019, a $660 Sauna Will Give Your Dog the Blow Dry of His Life

HapiFork

Throughout history, there have been so many gadgets designed to limit normal human behavior, but this one takes the (pan)cake. The HapiFork is yet another vibrating gadget that tells you to eat your meals slower (over 20 minutes), with the idea being that you are less likely to overeat. Personally, I wolf my own meals down like I’m in prison, so do your worst, HapiFork. I’ll eat with my hands if I have to! You’re not the boss of me!

Read more: Bolting Your Food? Put On the Brakes With HapiFork

Hushme

The Hushme is literally a “dumb” product — it’s designed to make its user mute to other people in the immediate vicinity. It was pitched as being useful in workplaces, but… if a co-worker gave me one of these, they’d better be wearing vacuum shoes, in order to clean up the gleefully stomped-on bits.

Read more: Hushme May Be the Weirdest, Yet Most Useful Wireless Headphones Ever Created

Belty

The original Belty was a prototype smart belt with a motor in it that adjusted itself to whether you just ate or were sitting down. Impractical as hell, but kind of cool? While there is a newer model, also called Belty, this one is even weirder — there’s no auto-sizing, but it does have a power bank charger in the buckle. OK, two things. Not only do I not want a potentially volatile compound near my nethers, I don’t want to connect a series of devices there either.

Read more: Meet Belty, the Ridiculous but Strangely Popular Show-Stealer of CES Unveiled

Xybernaut Poma

First shown off at CES 1998, the Hitachi Xybernaut wearable computer was a terrible idea long before Google Glass was even a gleam in Babak Parviz’s eye. The Windows CE-based Xybernaut Poma offered a 128MHz RISC processor and 32MB of RAM for the low price of $1,499, plus it strapped to your arm and your face and your belt!

Read more: Hitachi Fashioning Wearable PCs

Denso Vacuum Shoes

Shoes. You wear ’em. They wear out, you buy more. But that’s not exciting now, is it? They need things in them — phones, rockets, rollers and… vacuums? There are so many puns I could make about even just the name of the Denso Vacuum Shoes, but the fact that they existed at all was the biggest joke of all.

Read more: Vacuum Cleaner Shoes Show Up at CES Because Why Not

Technologies

Inflation concerns increase as Fed survey reveals one‑year outlook at peak level not seen since May 2023

Inflation concerns rose in September, pushing the New York Fed’s one‑year inflation outlook to 3.9% – its highest level since May 2023. Household spending expectations also climbed to 5.5%, while longer‑term inflation forecasts remained relatively stable.

Inflation worries grew in September, driving the near‑term expectation in the New York Federal Reserve’s monthly poll to its highest point in roughly three and a half years.

The Fed’s Survey of Consumer Expectations showed that the median forecast for inflation over the next twelve months rose to 3.9%, up 0.3 percentage point from August and the highest since May 2023, when it stood at 4.1%.

The same survey indicated that household spending growth is anticipated to reach 5.5%, also up 0.3 point month‑over‑month and the highest level since May 2023.

These results emerge as Fed officials debate the appropriate stance for monetary policy while inflation remains well above the 2% target.

Markets largely anticipate that the Federal Open Market Committee will hold benchmark rates steady at its October meeting. August inflation came in below expectations according to the Fed’s preferred gauge, and several officials, including New York Fed President John Williams, have suggested policymakers can afford to take their time when deciding on interest rates.

Looking further ahead, the survey found longer‑term expectations are more stable: the three‑year forecast edged up 0.1 point to 3.3%, while the five‑year outlook held steady at 3%.

Market‑based gauges, however, are less optimistic. The breakeven inflation rate, a closely watched bond indicator, places the five‑year outlook near its yearly high at 2.35%. Treasury yields have surged in recent weeks to levels not seen since the early 2000s.

Fed officials view inflation expectations as a key driver of actual inflation.

Energy price pressures remain central to the inflation story. Gasoline prices climbed almost 4% in August alone, per the Bureau of Labor Statistics, and fuel oil jumped more than 10%.

At the consumer level, utilities have sought $23.1 billion in rate increases so far in 2026, according to PowerLines, a nonpartisan consumer advocacy group. The third quarter alone accounted for $4.5 billion of those requests, the largest quarterly total on record. The New York Fed survey also found that consumers expect gas prices to rise 4.8% over the next year, up 0.2 point from August.

While investors hope the Fed will keep rates unchanged at its next meeting, they are pricing in a considerably tighter policy stance further out. Fed funds futures imply a rate of 5.58% in five years, whereas the current target range sits between 3.75% and 4%.

Correction: PowerLines is a nonpartisan consumer advocacy group; an earlier version misspelled its name.

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Technologies

Tanker Attacks Surge to Wartime Levels in Strait of Hormuz as Iran Escalates Efforts to Disrupt Oil Exports

Tanker attacks in the Strait of Hormuz have reached wartime highs as Iran escalates efforts to disrupt oil exports amid rising maritime risks.

Oil tankers navigating the Strait of Hormuz are facing near-daily attacks as Iran intensifies its operations aimed at disrupting a recovery in crude oil exports.

During the week ending October 4, eleven tankers were targeted while transiting Hormuz—the highest number of assaults on commercial vessels since the conflict began in late February, according to data from the International Maritime Organization (IMO), a United Nations agency. An additional five tankers have been struck this week.

Twelve sailors were injured on Monday when a projectile hit their tanker as it passed through Hormuz. The injured crew members are Indian nationals, and the vessel, named On Peace, is registered under the United Arab Emirates, according to the maritime security company Marisks.

“These activities underscore Iran’s determination to assert its influence over critical sea routes and sustain pressure on ships passing through,” the Joint Maritime Information Center cautioned in a notice issued Thursday. This center, a coalition of U.S. allies led by military forces based in Bahrain, tracks maritime threats in the area.

A senior official from Iran’s Revolutionary Guard Corps declared on Wednesday that Tehran will shut down all “unauthorized pathways” through Hormuz, as reported by Fars News Agency, which is viewed as aligned with the Guard.

The spike in tanker attacks coincides with a revival in Middle Eastern crude exports during September, returning to levels seen before the war—largely attributed to U.S. naval escorts guiding vessels through Hormuz via a corridor near Oman’s coastline.

“Cargo is still moving, but it’s doing so amid exceptionally dangerous maritime conditions,” noted Michelle Wiese Bockmann, a senior maritime intelligence analyst at Windward, a firm specializing in risk assessment and surveillance.

At least nine seafarers have lost their lives in ship attacks since July, according to the IMO.

“This cannot become the new standard,” stated Richard Meade, editor-in-chief of the shipping trade publication Lloyd’s List, during a briefing on Thursday.

On Thursday, U.S. Central Command provided updates to shippers regarding the situation in Hormuz. In a statement issued Wednesday, Centcom confirmed that 20 million barrels of crude had successfully transited the strait, countering Iranian assertions that the passage was closed.

Recently, oil shipments have declined as attacks have escalated. Crude exports through Hormuz averaged 8.5 million barrels per day for the week ending Wednesday—roughly 40% lower than pre-war norms, according to Kpler data released Friday. Overall Middle Eastern shipments stood at 15.3 million barrels per day, down 10% compared to pre-war figures.

Iran itself has not exported any crude oil since late August due to the U.S. naval blockade imposed on the Islamic Republic, according to Kpler.

Tehran has extended its operations further into the Persian Gulf, with the Revolutionary Guard warning that it will not limit its actions to Hormuz alone. The Guard stated it would target any vessels violating Iran’s transit regulations across the broader region, as reported by state media outlet Tasnim.

A tanker was struck by multiple projectiles off the coast of Qatar on Wednesday, causing casualties, according to a British maritime security organization monitoring Gulf conditions.

Additionally, another tanker, Gem No. 2, was hit by a projectile on Friday near the UAE coast, triggering a fire onboard. The vessel departed from Ras Tanura, Saudi Arabia, in March and has remained within the Persian Gulf since the war began, according to Marisks.

Since the onset of the Iran conflict in late February, at least 24 sailors have died in attacks on 100 commercial ships across Hormuz, the Persian Gulf, and the Gulf of Oman, according to the IMO.

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Technologies

Trump strikes deal with Putin to supply Russian diesel to U.S. and global markets

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