Technologies

The Absolute Worst CES Tech We’ve Seen in the Last 25 Years

Not every gadget can be a winner. Toilet robots, MP3 weaponry and vacuum shoes are just some of the oddities we’ve seen at CES over the last two decades.

CES 2023 is over, and together we’ve seen our share of both weird and wonderful devices at this year’s show, but… mostly weird.

Flying cars and obscure robots are so old hat now, and so I wondered if CES could do anything less practical and even more completely bonkers. Turns out it can! Over the past 20-plus years, I’ve seen gadgets so stupefying that sometimes they exist purely because journalists like me will write about them. But it’s time to call out the really awful ones, the worst of the worst. Vacuum shoes, toilet paper robots, MP3 weapon holsters, it’s your time to shine!

The most interesting part about this rogues gallery is that some of these products — the Pepe pet dryer, the HapiFork and the Hushme, to name a few — are still being sold today. That’s right: You blew it up, you maniacs!

Dyson Zone Air-Purifying Headphones

Not technically a CES product, as this was announced during 2022, but Dyson was demonstrating the Zone headphones in Las Vegas during CES 2023. Though the Zone looks like it should be a COVID mask, that’s unfortunately not what it does. According to the Dyson site, development on the Zone began way back in 2016 as a personal air filter — for pollution, mainly — and as such, it was never designed to protect against COVID. Furthermore, one critic has claimed the gadget’s force-driven fans could even help maximize your chances of catching coronavirus. CNET’s Katie Collins, who tried it out at Dyson’s HQ in the UK, thought it was «too brilliant and bizarre to ignore.»

Charmin Rollbot

Computer peripherals manufacturer Razer is the king of creating «look at me» products specifically for CES, but toilet tissue brand Charmin became notorious for this 2020 entry. That’s right, in the year that saw the mass panic buying of toilet paper came a robot that could bring you even more! Coincidence? Yes… probably. The RollBot was never going to be a real product, but we loved/loathed it anyway.

Kolibree Smart Toothbrush

Remember when we had to wash our hands for 20 seconds by singing songs to ourselves? The same methodology also applies to brushing your teeth, but why should you use your own brain and lips like a sucker? There have been many smart toothbrushes over the years, but today I’m picking on the Kolibree. Everything was just fine until the arrival of «the world’s first connected electric toothbrush.» Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you…

Taser MP3 Holster

Back in the 2000s, the iPod became such a cultural phenomenon that every company rushed to create an MP3 player of its own. This culminated in what is one of the dumbest CES products in recent memory: the Tazer MP3 holster. Imagine trying to not only charge your holster but also connect it via USB to your computer to fill it up with 1GB of tunes.

Pepe Pet Dryer

Want to find a new way to make your small dog or cat hate you forever? Lock them in a cube prison for 25 minutes (!) and subject them to gusts of hot air. This combination torture device/dryer would have set you back $660, or you could just throw a towel over your wet dog like a normal human.

HapiFork

Throughout history, there have been so many gadgets designed to limit normal human behavior, but this one takes the (pan)cake. The HapiFork is yet another vibrating gadget that tells you to eat your meals slower (over 20 minutes), with the idea being that you are less likely to overeat. Personally, I wolf my own meals down like I’m in prison, so do your worst, HapiFork. I’ll eat with my hands if I have to! You’re not the boss of me!

Hushme

The Hushme is literally a «dumb» product — it’s designed to make its user mute to other people in the immediate vicinity. It was pitched as being useful in workplaces, but… if a co-worker gave me one of these, they’d better be wearing vacuum shoes, in order to clean up the gleefully stomped-on bits.

Belty

The original Belty was a prototype smart belt with a motor in it that adjusted itself to whether you just ate or were sitting down. Impractical as hell, but kind of cool? While there is a newer model, also called Belty, this one is even weirder — there’s no auto-sizing, but it does have a power bank charger in the buckle. OK, two things. Not only do I not want a potentially volatile compound near my nethers, I don’t want to connect a series of devices there either.

Xybernaut Poma

First shown off at CES 1998, the Hitachi Xybernaut wearable computer was a terrible idea long before Google Glass was even a gleam in Babak Parviz’s eye. The Windows CE-based Xybernaut Poma offered a 128MHz RISC processor and 32MB of RAM for the low price of $1,499, plus it strapped to your arm and your face and your belt!

Read more: Hitachi Fashioning Wearable PCs

Denso Vacuum Shoes

Shoes. You wear ’em. They wear out, you buy more. But that’s not exciting now, is it? They need things in them — phones, rockets, rollers and… vacuums? There are so many puns I could make about even just the name of the Denso Vacuum Shoes, but the fact that they existed at all was the biggest joke of all.

Technologies

iOS 17 Cheat Sheet: Your Questions on the iPhone Update Answered

Here’s what you need to know about new features and upcoming updates for your iPhone.

Apple’s iOS 17 was released in September, shortly after the company held its Wonderlust event, where the tech giant announced the new iPhone 15 lineup, the Apple Watch Series 9 and the Apple Watch Ultra 2. We put together this cheat sheet to help you learn about and use the new features in iOS 17. It’ll also help you keep track of the subsequent iOS 17 updates.

iOS 17 updates

Using iOS 17

Getting started with iOS 17

Make sure to check back periodically for more iOS 17 tips and how to use new features as Apple releases more updates.

17 Hidden iOS 17 Features You Should Definitely Know About

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See all photos

Technologies

Get Ready for a Striking Aurora That Could Also Disrupt Radio Communications

Don’t expect the storm to cause a lingering problem, though.

A geomagnetic storm is threatening radio communications Monday night, but that doesn’t mean you should be concerned. In fact, it may be an opportunity to see a colorful aurora in the night sky.

The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration has issued a geomagnetic storm watch after witnessing a coronal mass ejection from the sun on Saturday. The watch, which was issued over the weekend and will expire after Monday, said the onset of the storm passing over Earth on Sunday night represented a «moderate» threat to communications. As the storm continues to pass through, it could deliver a «strong» threat on Monday night that could cause radio communications to be temporarily disrupted during the worst of it.

Even so, NOAA said, «the general public should not be concerned.»

A coronal mass ejection occurs when magnetic field and plasma mass are violently expelled from the sun’s corona, or the outermost portion of the sun’s atmosphere. In the vast majority of cases, the ejection occurs with no real threat to Earth. However, in the event the ejection happens in the planet’s direction, a geomagnetic storm occurs, and the Earth’s magnetic field is temporarily affected.

In most cases, geomagnetic storms cause little to no disruption on Earth, with radio communications and satellites affected most often. In extreme cases, a geomagnetic storm can cause significant and potentially life-threatening power outages — a prospect that, luckily, the planet hasn’t faced.

Switching poles

Every 11 years, the sun’s magnetic poles switch, with the north pole and south pole swapping positions. During those cycles, the sun’s activity ramps up as it gets closer to pole-switching time. The height of its activity is called solar maximum, and scientists believe we either may be entering the solar maximum or may be already in it.

During periods of heightened solar activity, sunspots increase on the sun and there’s an increase in coronal mass ejections, among other phenomena. According to NOAA, solar maximum could extend into October of this year before the sun’s activity calms and it works towards its less-active phase, solar minimum.

Even when geomagnetic storms hit Earth and disrupt communications, the effects are usually short-lived. Those most affected, including power grid operators and pilots and air traffic controllers communicating over long distances, have fail-safe technologies and backup communications to ensure operational continuity.

But geomagnetic storms aren’t only about radios. In most cases, they also present unique opportunities to see auroras in the night sky. When the storms hit, the plasma they carry creates a jaw-dropping aurora, illuminating the night sky with brilliant colors. Those auroras can be especially pronounced during the most intense phases of the storm, making for nice stargazing.

If you’re interested in seeing the aurora, you’ll need to be ready. The NOAA said the «brunt of the storm has passed» and even if it lingers into Tuesday, there won’t be much to see after Monday night.

Technologies

Last Total Solar Eclipse for 20 Years Is Coming: How to See and Photograph It

It’s your last chance until 2044.

Get your eclipse glasses ready, Skygazers: the Great American Eclipse is on its way. On April 8, there’ll be a total eclipse over North America, the last one until 2044.

A total solar eclipse happens when the moon passes between the Earth and the sun, blocking the sun and turning an otherwise sunny day to darkness for a short period of time. Depending on the angle at which you’re viewing the eclipse, you may see the sun completely shrouded by the moon (called totality) or some variation of it. The more off-angle you are and the further you are from the path of the eclipse, the less likely you’ll be to see the totality.

The 2024 total solar eclipse will happen on Monday, April 8. The Great American Eclipse will reach the Mexican Pacific coast at 11:07 a.m. PT (2:07 p.m. ET), and then traverse the US in a northeasterly direction from Texas to Maine, and on into easternmost Canada. If you want a good look at it, but don’t live in the path of totality, you shouldn’t wait much longer to book accommodation and travel to a spot on the path.

Or how about booking a seat in the sky? Delta Airlines made headlines for offering a flight that allows you to see the entire path of totality. Its first eclipse flight, from Austin, Texas, to Detroit sold out quickly. But as of Monday, Delta has added a second flight from Dallas to Detroit, which also covers the path of totality. The airline also has five flights that will offer prime eclipse viewing.

Not everyone can get on one of those elusive eclipse-viewing flights. Here’s a look at other options to nab a chance to see this rare sight and what to know about it.

Total solar eclipse path

The eclipse will cross over the Pacific coast of Mexico and head northeast over mainland Mexico. The eclipse will then make its way over San Antonio at approximately 2:30 p.m. ET on April 8 and move through Texas, over the southeastern part of Oklahoma and northern Arkansas by 2:50 p.m. ET.

By 3 p.m. ET, the eclipse will be over southern Illinois, and just 5 minutes later, will be traveling over Indianapolis. Folks in northwestern Ohio will be treated to the eclipse by 3:15 p.m. ET, and it will then travel over Lake Erie and Buffalo, New York, by 3:20 p.m. ET. Over the next 10 minutes, the eclipse will be seen over northern New York state, then over Vermont. By 3:35 p.m. ET, the eclipse will work its way into Canada and off the Eastern coast of North America.

Best places to watch the Great American Eclipse

When evaluating the best places to watch this year’s total eclipse, you’ll first want to determine where you’ll have the best angle to see the totality. The farther off-angle you are — in other words, the farther north or south of the eclipse’s path — the less of an impact you can expect.

Therefore, if you want to have the best chance of experiencing the eclipse, you’ll want to be in its path. As of this writing, most of the cities in the eclipse’s path have some hotel availability, but recent reports have suggested that rooms are booking up. And as more rooms are booked, prices are going up.

So if you want to be in the eclipse’s path, and need a hotel to do it, move fast. And Delta’s eclipse-viewing flight from Dallas to Detroit has just four seats left at the time of publication.

Eclipse eye safety and photography

As with any solar eclipse, it’s critical you keep eye safety in mind.

During the eclipse, and especially during the periods before and after totality, don’t look directly at the sun without special eye protection. Also, be sure not to look at the sun through a camera (including the camera on your phone), binoculars, a telescope or any other viewing device. This could cause serious eye injury. Sunglasses aren’t enough to protect your eyes from damage.

If you want to view the eclipse, you’ll instead need solar viewing glasses that comply with the ISO 12312-2 safety standard. Anything that doesn’t meet that standard or greater won’t be dark enough to protect your eyes. Want to get them for free? If you’ve got a Warby Parker eyeglasses store nearby, the company is giving away free, ISO-certified solar eclipse glasses at all of its stores from April 1 until the eclipse, while supplies last.

If you don’t have eclipse viewing glasses handy, you can instead use indirect methods for viewing the eclipse, like a pinhole projector.

Read more: A Photographer’s Adventure With the Eclipse

In the event you want to take pictures of the eclipse, attach a certified solar filter to your camera. Doing so will protect your eyes and allow you to take photos while you view the eclipse through your lens.

There’s also a new app to help you both protect your eyes and take better photos of the eclipse on your phone. Solar Snap, designed by a former Hubble Space Telescope astronomer, comes with a Solar Snap camera filter that attaches to the back of an iPhone or Android phone, along with solar eclipse glasses for protecting your eyesight during the event. After you attach the filter to your phone, you can use the free Solar Snap Eclipse app to zoom in on the eclipse, adjust exposure and other camera settings, and ultimately take better shots of the eclipse.

2024 eclipse compared to 2017

The last total solar eclipse occurred in 2017, and many Americans had a great view. Although there are plenty of similarities between the 2017 total solar eclipse and the one coming April 8, there are a handful of differences. Mainly, the 2024 eclipse is going to cover more land and last longer.

The 2017 eclipse started over the northwest US and moved southeast. Additionally, that eclipse’s path was up to 71 miles wide, compared with a maximum width of 122 miles for this year’s eclipse. Perhaps most importantly, the moon completely covered the sun for just 2 minutes, 40 seconds in 2017. This year, maximum totality will last for nearly four-and-a-half minutes.